We attract people at our common level of woundedness or our common level of emotional health. This means that if you want to attract a healthy, loving partner, you need to become that healthy person first. This does not mean that you need to have attained some imagined level of perfection, but it does mean that the kind of energy you project has everything to do with the kind of person you attract.
We must look inward and see what about us is attracting these same type of relationships and people. Maybe there are qualities about ourselves that we choose to ignore that actually mirror the relationships and people in our lives? Chances are there are.
One of the first steps to take in manifesting the lover you truly want is to make a list. It sounds simple because it is! List the qualities that you desire in a lover. Loyalty, consistency, adventure, honesty, romance, and so on. List them all and then list more. This is not a list where you consider the physical attributes you desire. Save that for later. This is just a list about the qualities you seek in a partner.
So now that you’ve made your list, what comes next? Become those qualities. Every single one of them. Not only do those qualities place you in perfect vibration to attract the same back to you but it also increases the chances that you are going to find the person you are looking for. If you want to attract someone who is adventurous you certainly cannot do that if you’re too afraid to venture beyond your four walls. Likewise, you will not meet someone who is outgoing and friendly if you are walking around barely talking to anyone and keeping your eyes trained downward with a scowl on your face.
Second, be aware of the emotional and psychic broadcast that comes from you. We all emit energy, some people do not realize they are picking up on it when they encounter someone but they are. If you dwell on being unlucky and feel we are always unhappy in love, then we are emitting that to everyone who we encounter. Obsessing over being in a relationship instead of just relaxing and enjoying the ride, sends a message of desperation and anxiety. If you do not want to emit desperation, negativity, and other qualities which drive others away in your broadcast then you must embody the qualities you do wish to attract and to emit to others!
Third, you must believe and see this person coming to you. It doesn’t matter how, it doesn’t matter where or what this person looks like but you but affirm that this person, the right person is en-route to you. Do not try to place too much focus on the how or where you will meet your match. Love is something you cannot control. The Universe will decide when, where and how this person comes to you, but you will choose the person. Create affirmations to repeat daily, sometimes several times each day. Be certain your lover is approaching.
- A lover who is perfect for me is entering my life!
- I am lucky in love and the perfect partner is mine!
- It is easy for me to express love and it is easily expressed back to me!
- I attract only those who have my highest good in heart!
- I am lucky in love and there is always more than enough love being directed to me
The important thing is to express your affirmation in terms of already having these things, or this lover. It is not about expressing a future state of something coming towards you, because that simply attracts the state of “coming” not “having”.
What you say is as important as what you feel, so feel it too. When you think of being unlucky in love or think you are unloved, it becomes a powerful feeling. Thoughts become feelings, so you must create new thoughts to have new feelings. See yourself with an amazing partner, feel the way you would if you were with them, shopping for groceries or spending an afternoon down by the ocean together. Allow those feelings to come over you as you repeat your affirmations.
When you get down to it having the perfect lover and the right relationship is all about what you put out there. Though we sometimes feel that our relationships are dependent upon others, the truth is it depends on what we attract and allow in our lives.